Have you ever had one of those times where you had a job or something to do and you knew, like you just had that in-depth feeling right your very soul that it's going to turn out great. It's like for some unknown reason you just have this great confidence that you'll make it and the results are going to far outweigh anyone's expectations of you including yourself. It sort of raises your expectaions, like something extraordinary is going to happen and just then poof, the moment you do it it's either normal or worse.
Why does that happen anyway? I don't get it. Is it that something extraordinary was really going to happen and I messed it up at the last minute or was that just me deluding myself.
I was going to sing at fellowship meeting yesterday and I thought it was going to be really something, I really did. In fact I was so convinced I could have bet all the money I had on me that it would. (Maybe not all my money, I would have set aside what I was going to give as offering and to buy my supper)
Anyway, the moment came and well it was just normal. Well I can't really tell about how it affected the people before whom I sang but for me it was just normal, I didn't feel anything. And I didn't get any comments about it anyway.
If I hadn't felt so great about it in the first place I would have been elated by now, because I haven't done that before and I should have been pre-occupied with just getting through it without any mistakes which I did.
Ah well, I still like to think there was maybe something I did that didn't let things go the way it was supposed to but I just can't get a hold of it. I like to believe I'm an extraordinary person with great things to do in this life, but it tends to happen too often, especially with things I feel I'm naturally good at, when I eventually do them, well... the results are never as good as I think and sometimes even very bad.
Hey, maybe my real natural talent is having this overactive imagination. But dear God! I really hope not!